Anthony and I had been debating whether we wanted to share this intimate moment publicly, but after much thought we decided sharing some of the story would be good. We also decided we wanted to share the obvious work God has orchestrated with this adoption. When we follow God's will, things we believed to be a coincidence clearly are not a mere coincidence, but God at work.
The embassy was gracious enough to expedite our process since I was staying in country. They requested an interview with Max biological mom on the morning of the 9th and then we would have our embassy appointment in the afternoon and receive our visa a couple hours later. The in-country case worker told me she would be coming into the city from Woliso sometime in the late afternoon of the 8th. I usually visited the children at the transition house and I wanted to make sure I saw the kids and nannies before she came into town. I wanted to meet with her, but I wanted it to be after her embassy appointment.
Typically when I arrived at the transition house, I would be greeted and swarmed by the children. On this day, not only was I greeted by the children but also by a beautiful dark skinned woman with the same almond shaped eyes as my Max. I instantly knew it was his biological mother and in that same instant she reached for her son, my son, our son and walked inside with him in her arms. I remember just letting her take him and starting to cry. All the nannies speechless and the kids emotional, as I sat in a corner and cried. Thinking back, I am not exactly sure why I was SO emotional in that instant. I believe it was a mixture of insecurity (she would change her mind about the adoption) and sadness for this situation (her face was so sad when she saw him, she also cried in that instant.)
It took me a few minutes to collect myself, and some consoling from the children, until I could make it inside the transition house. I sat down by her and we smiled at each other. To tell you the truth Max looks nothing like her except for the eyes; the same shape and the same ability to smile with them. She is a beautiful woman and you could tell she has a tender heart. After about 5 minutes, which felt like forever, she told one of the nannies something in Oromifa (the language she spoke, she did not speak Amharic) and the nanny laughed. When I asked what she had said, the nanny said, "the same thing we have all been telling you, he looks like your son like your biological son....he is meant to be your." It meant the world to hear these words because I love her son, my son, as if he were my biological child.
Before I left that Monday afternoon, I asked her if we could discuss Max birth story and if I could record it, she agreed and we said our goodbyes. She looked devastated. I can't tell you how many times she kissed Max in the seconds leading to our departure from the T house. It broke my heart.
Max Adoption Story:
The following day we met with his biological mother in the 3rd floor of the T house. I set up my computer and started recording. I asked her a variety of questions and I learned many things about my sweet child. First and foremost, Max was a twin....surprised? because I sure was. His baby sibling (I didn't ask the gender) died during birth. She named him Elias because she felt he would do great things in the world which is the same reason we named him Maximus. She gave Max up for adoption because her husband left her for another woman and she could not afford to feed her other 3 children if she had to breast feed Max and not work. The pregnancy had gone well; there were no complications through out. When I asked her if she had any questions for Anthony or myself she said, "No, if I live long enough I hope to meet him one day, but I know my son will be taken care of and I feel very happy." What a blessing!
My sweet Max, your mother loved you so much. She gave you because she knew she could not provide for you, but she still chose to give you life. She prays you will become a great man of God. Papa and I hope and pray for the very same.
The embassy was gracious enough to expedite our process since I was staying in country. They requested an interview with Max biological mom on the morning of the 9th and then we would have our embassy appointment in the afternoon and receive our visa a couple hours later. The in-country case worker told me she would be coming into the city from Woliso sometime in the late afternoon of the 8th. I usually visited the children at the transition house and I wanted to make sure I saw the kids and nannies before she came into town. I wanted to meet with her, but I wanted it to be after her embassy appointment.
Typically when I arrived at the transition house, I would be greeted and swarmed by the children. On this day, not only was I greeted by the children but also by a beautiful dark skinned woman with the same almond shaped eyes as my Max. I instantly knew it was his biological mother and in that same instant she reached for her son, my son, our son and walked inside with him in her arms. I remember just letting her take him and starting to cry. All the nannies speechless and the kids emotional, as I sat in a corner and cried. Thinking back, I am not exactly sure why I was SO emotional in that instant. I believe it was a mixture of insecurity (she would change her mind about the adoption) and sadness for this situation (her face was so sad when she saw him, she also cried in that instant.)
It took me a few minutes to collect myself, and some consoling from the children, until I could make it inside the transition house. I sat down by her and we smiled at each other. To tell you the truth Max looks nothing like her except for the eyes; the same shape and the same ability to smile with them. She is a beautiful woman and you could tell she has a tender heart. After about 5 minutes, which felt like forever, she told one of the nannies something in Oromifa (the language she spoke, she did not speak Amharic) and the nanny laughed. When I asked what she had said, the nanny said, "the same thing we have all been telling you, he looks like your son like your biological son....he is meant to be your." It meant the world to hear these words because I love her son, my son, as if he were my biological child.
Before I left that Monday afternoon, I asked her if we could discuss Max birth story and if I could record it, she agreed and we said our goodbyes. She looked devastated. I can't tell you how many times she kissed Max in the seconds leading to our departure from the T house. It broke my heart.
Max Adoption Story:
The following day we met with his biological mother in the 3rd floor of the T house. I set up my computer and started recording. I asked her a variety of questions and I learned many things about my sweet child. First and foremost, Max was a twin....surprised? because I sure was. His baby sibling (I didn't ask the gender) died during birth. She named him Elias because she felt he would do great things in the world which is the same reason we named him Maximus. She gave Max up for adoption because her husband left her for another woman and she could not afford to feed her other 3 children if she had to breast feed Max and not work. The pregnancy had gone well; there were no complications through out. When I asked her if she had any questions for Anthony or myself she said, "No, if I live long enough I hope to meet him one day, but I know my son will be taken care of and I feel very happy." What a blessing!
My sweet Max, your mother loved you so much. She gave you because she knew she could not provide for you, but she still chose to give you life. She prays you will become a great man of God. Papa and I hope and pray for the very same.
Kenny, what an emotional story. I can't stop crying. He will really treassure this when he's older. You're an amazing woman.
ReplyDeleteAwe Flavia, thanks for the sweet words. Anthony and I are blessed beyond measure. Hope you can meet Max soon.
ReplyDeleteWhat an amazing story. That is so wonderful that you have that to keep and share with him. I'm so glad you had that opportunity to meet with her. :)
ReplyDeleteBeautiful :)) may god bless your family , wish u the best. ;)
ReplyDeletei came across your blog via pinterest (thank God for technology, right?) and here I am at work, secretly wiping off tears as I read Max's adoption story. thank you for sharing...
ReplyDeleteAh, Pinterest. Thank you for reading. Max is a blessing to our lives. We are truly blessed beyond merit.
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