Satan will blind you if you let him

I would be lying if I said I have not been stressed lately. Between my grandmother and mother in the hospital-- yes, my mom randomly got pneumonia, work, students, paper work, adoption, my weight, my face breaking out, you name it. It's been hard lately. I can't tell you the last time I actually cooked a decent meal for my husband. And while Anthony was in California he got bronchitis and he does not have health insurance so we are now having to pay for that out of pocket; let me tell you, it is not cheap, at all.

If you would have talked to me 2 weeks ago, I would have told you how angry I was. I would have complained and become even more upset at the current situation. But a week ago, I was challenged by a friend. She challenged me to focus on the positive/good things in my life and write them down. And I did. While doing so I realized how blessed I am in comparison to how crappy things really seem. I also realized when I focus on the 'bad', it is Satan trying to blind me. I am embarrassed to say how blinded I can become when I focus solely on the 'bad.'

I have so much to be thankful for in my life. I have a wonderful husband, a beautiful home, incredible friends, supportive family and community, clothes to clothe me, shoes to protect my feet, a hot shower after a long day at work, electricity, water, food, I have all the things our child does not have. How dare I complain about a stressful day at work when I should be thankful for having one when many don't. Or dare to think eating spaghetti twice or three times a week is awful when our child has probably ate the same things for weeks. I start to realize how selfish I can be when I have so much to be thankful for, when I am so rich. I am glad my friend challenged me. Honestly, I had been focusing on the 'bad', I had forgotten to trust God, to talk to God, to lean on God, to obey God, to feed on the water and bread of life. I am filled with life when I spend time in the Word or praying, yet I seem to forget every once in a while. I pray I can trust, continue to trust, and trust some more. Pray for me too.

On another note, today we got an invoice from our adoption agency for the next amount we have to pay and kid you not the amount we have to pay is the exact amount we have in our savings. We will literally deplete our entire savings after this transaction. I did freak out for a minute, but God has never let us down. He has never left us astray, he always provides and he is a God who makes all things possible. Please continue praying for us, for our finances, for our son, for us to be humble, for our concert, and for our marriage to continue to grow in God.